Surprise!

So color me surprised to find out the hotel has internet! We arrived safely yesterday-- and I even got to ride in first class from Houston to Tegucigalpa thanks to the generosity of my Dad's friend that met us for the flight. He'd been upgraded-- but gave his first class seat to me!

Yesterday was a loooong day but a good one. I think the rest of the "week" here is going to be very interesting. Here's to hoping that Gustav doesn't make it a little difficult to come home!!

I don't have anything terribly interesting to report or the time to time it anyway right now, but I did work on a blog post last night during the Spanish meeting I couldn't understand a word of. (That's not rude, right? I just looked like I was taking notes)

The End is Here

So when I promised to post every day this month, I neglected to factor in the small matter of me leaving the country. I'm headed to Honduras tomorrow-- and so for quite obvious reasons, this will be the last post for August. Unfortunately it isn't going to be an interesting one because (not surprisingly) I have not yet begun to pack.....and seeing as it is after 9 and my parents are picking me up tomorrow morning at 4:45....I'm thinking I better get on it.

....right after I eat a fudgecicle that is....

I Can't Believe This Was 3 Years Ago

Is November Here Yet?

I've been wondering lately if anyone actually watches the U.S. Presidential conventions as a method of deciding who they are going to vote for. Both parties basically put on a week long propaganda show as far as I can tell...and nothing really gets decided. It seems to me to be a little symptomatic of our culture in that all of the spontaneity has been sucked right out of it. It is the same reason that the "debates" aren't really debates at all-- they are just people pretending to ask questions and other people pretending to give spontaneous yet remarkable sound-bite ready responses.

Do I sound cynical yet?

"Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I may be wrong?"

~Jane Austen

That Time Again

I've been going through old files on my computer tonight-- reading things I'd completely forgotten I'd written (which, let's face it, is a weird way to entertain yourself). I found a little something that I wrote right around the time of my 26th birthday. It's kind of personal, and if at the time you'd told me I would EVER post it on the internet for others to read, I would have given you one of my patented eye rolls/dirty looks. But reading it tonight made me laugh (in a good way) and remember a fairly major paradigm shift that I went through in my mid 20s.

I think this will make sense to some of you.....and those are the people I'm posting it for. So, to anyone to whom the below words mean ANYTHING....this is for you!





I think some people spend their whole lives waiting for their life to begin.

I know this because I have spent 26 years feeling like I am standing in line waiting for my turn on the ride---only my turn never comes. Sure, I get to watch other people take the ride, and I can even talk to the people in line around me about the best places to sit and the most dangerous curves-but I've never been able to experience them for myself because I can't seem to get to the front of the line.

It's life through a view-finder and I'm sick of it. So you know what I'm saying? Screw this ride. I'm gonna go build my one of my own.

Just My Humble Opinion Regarding the Election....

I would rather someone not know how many houses they have than not know when they believe life begins.

A Sad (But True) Admission

This may be news to no one but ME, but I have recently realized that I am a girl who likes boundaries. I feel better when I know what the expectations of me are and what the plan is to get there. I deal best when I have deadlines I have to work towards. (Exhibit A-- the whole "post once a day rule" that I have to impose on myself in order to actually post on here halfway regularly).

And you know what? I hate it. It is SO not interesting. Who (besides a Marine) likes a a rules and regulations girl? It would be much more mysterious if I flouted rules and convention and just did whatever fit my fancy.

But I can't. I always call before I come over. I always knock before I come in. I always sit in my assigned seat.

This is me. I'm just going to have to learn to accept it.

Some of My Favorite Vacation Pictures

We interrupt this monthly posting schedule because our friend Clark is in town! We will resume normal programming tomorrow.

(If you don't remember or know who Clark is, please click his name for a very necessary introduction!)

My Favorite Article of the Day

Outback mayor seeks ‘ugly duckling’ women
‘Beauty-disadvantaged’ urged to move to woman-deprived Mount Isa

Read All About It



Cheryl forwarded me this article this morning at work. I'm not sure how insulted I am. This may be the second time she's "accidentally" called me ugly this month! It is for that reason I feel free to make fun of her on here and tell you all that she was quick to point out that all of the available men in the above AUSTRALIAN town would "at least have British accents". Sure they would. If they had just moved from a DIFFERENT COUNTRY.

Oprah & Her Friends Have Lost Their Ever Loving Minds

Today while driving home I was playing with the satellite radio on my new car. I landed on the "Oprah and Friend" channel-- and even though I have a long standing policy of taking Oprah (and her ego) with a HUGE grain of salt......I was curious what Oprah's "Friends" had to talk about for 24 hours a day on the radio. Would we get some Dr. Phil? Would we get some decorating tips? Well-- my limited exposure to it has convinced me that Oprah and Friends radio basically consists of the biggest pile of New Age mumbo jumbo you have ever heard.

First up was Nate Berkus (and correct me if I'm wrong here-- but isn't he some sort of interior designer??) talking with some spirit medium dude about the "levels" that spirits work their way through after death-- and how the biggest motivator for them to move to the higher realms of the afterworld is LOVE! (I had to put LOVE in all caps because of the way they were stressing it.....I felt they were using verbal caps). Also? Apparently spirits have physical needs as well-- and all they have to do is envision something to have it. For instance, if they want a turkey sandwich all they have to do is picture it and it shows up. Seriously. That was their example, not mine. What on earth any of this has to do with picking the right cushions for my living room, I just don't know.

Next up was some looney bin escapee whose name I don't know-- but whose profession is apparently the "teaching of the laws of attraction". His schpeel was all about putting out the vibes that bring positive or negative things into your life-- and how everything that happens to you is because of your vibrations. He also added that for those who might feel that they didn't put anything negative out there-- and yet were still struck with "bad boyfriends" or "job difficulties" or "money troubles"-- well, they just needed to understand that his job was not to convince them of the truth of the laws of attraction (because, you see, they are there whether you choose to believe in them or not)-- his job was just to instruct all of us little people in the WAYS of these laws. (And, presumably, to make 6 figures a year doing it). I think my favorite piece of wisdom he shared was that we all have built in vibration-ometers in us....and that they are called EMOTIONS. (To that I say-- Thank you, Einstein. I never would have guessed that my EMOTIONS were telling me how I felt. That is truly an amazing piece of insight). I turned the channel before we got to just what it was, exactly, that 4 year olds with cancer "put out there" in order to bring it on themselves.

After that I was done....but it left me feeling slightly horrified. I mean, it isn't as if I hadn't ever heard of any of this before. Spiritual mediums and philosophies like"the Secret" aren't exactly new to the world, but still. I mean-- I haven't really watched Oprah in years-- but are the millions of women who watch her show really buying into this? I'm genuinely curious now.

A Close Call

We had a near blog tragedy tonight-- and you have my mother to thank for averting it. I very nearly forgot to post ANYTHING tonight. I know-- devastating, right? I was so busy watching Michael Phelps win his 8th gold medal (It isn't often I feel slightly hostile towards Australians...but tonight was the exception)-- that it completely slipped my mind that I hadn't posted anything today. (The topic of my unexpected addiction to Olympics coverage is a topic for another day)

Now it is late, and I'm tired-- and to be perfectly honest, I'm drawing a blank on anything remotely interesting to say. (I know, I know-- hasn't exactly stopped the rambling before....)

And so I will merely wish you a happy August 16th and call it good.

Happy Birthday Grandma!!

Today is my Grandmother's birthday-- and I really feel that I am sadly overdue in telling her (and all of you) why she is such an amazing, wonderful, fun, all around fabulous person to have as a Grandmother!

First, let me start with one of my favorite pictures of her and my grandfather:



I enjoy this picture for several reasons but the primary one is the expression on her face-- doesn't she just look like she's up to something? THIS is the girl you wanna hang out with. I'm dying to know what she was thinking in this picture! (Also? I am jealous of her cute outfit--particularly the shoes!) And you know what? My grandma is STILL someone you wanna hang out with. She's hilarious, remembers a zillion stories, and knows a little (and A LOT) about just about everything. (She's probably protesting this point as she reads this-- but Grandma....face it. You ARE a knitting expert. Your cinnamon rolls ARE the best ever. You know more about college and NBA basketball than most guys I know, and I will always insist on having you on my Trivial Pursuit team!)

But more than any of that-- my grandmother is the most loyal and loving person you could ask for. She has been a blessing in my life since the day I was born (and not just because she introduced me to Hershey's syrup as a child). She is a patient, loving Christian example that makes those of us lucky enough to be in her family proud just to be one of Laverne's grandkids (or kids, or great grandkids....). She has an amazing ability to make me feel like the most interesting person on the planet even when I really have nothing better to talk about than the latest customer complaints at work.

You are an awesome woman, grandma-- and if I only manage to have half of the positive influence on those in my life that you have given to those around you-- I will consider myself quite a success.

Happy Birthday! I love you!

(And I would like to point out that while you might have lots of grandkids and great grandkids that love you dearly-- I am still the only "littlest angel". I'm just saying.....)

Puzzling Male Fashion Trends

Dear American Apparel,

WHY are you encouraging men to dress this way? You have THIS available in "over 20 colors"! Really? Is that supposed to be exciting? Is hairy male cleavage the new hip trend? I don't understand. It is bad enough that it is almost impossible for women to find tops these days that aren't cut to our belly buttons....but now you are dragging the men down with us? I really think you need to reconsider. I mean, it isn't like the guys can do what we do and just put a tank top underneath. THAT would (believe it or not) look even more amazingly stupid.

Think about it.

Best regards (but with a high level of concern),

Sarah

If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.

Oscar Wilde

Friends That Don't Answer Messages

I once left a message for a friend of mine because I had a crucial question that needed answering. Sometimes you don't have the answers for the big questions that strike you in your life-- and in those times it is important to be able to turn to your friends that are experts in their fields and trust that they will walk you through your questions and help you to see the answers that you just couldn't find on your own.

Unfortunately, in my time of need-- my friend did not come through for me. And so I am left to wonder with no answers to be found. And so now, I turn to you my blog world friends to see if you can help me with this very important question:


In the comics, does Batman have a girlfriend? And if not, why not?

Warning: This Post is For Women Only

Alright ladies-- need a reason to watch the Olympics? This one is good enough for me.






Now I know what you might be thinking-- surely this post is beneath me. To that charge I answer-- no, it really isn't. I'm just encouraging you all to show your American spirit and admire their athleticism.

I love the U.S.A. So shoot me.

Questions for Walmart

1. Does anyone really buy the Lemon Pepper rotisserie chickens or are they just space savers until you finish cooking more of the "Traditional" flavor?

2. When you were designing the new motion-sensitive lights in the frozen food sections, did you realize you would make your shoppers feel like they are walking some sort of weird red-carpet that lights up as they go every time they want to buy a South Beach frozen pizza?

3. Have you considered telling your greeters that rushing at a customer who just walked in and then grabbing her purse to strap it in with the seat belt in her cart might be a little disconcerting? Especially with no explanation?

4. What happened, exactly, to make you establish the "one person and one person only per dressing room rule" that is now apparently corporate policy?

5. Do you know that the giant, middle of the aisle "islands" of that one weight loss drug that causes all those gross side effects is really kind of unappetizing-- especially since your big signs list them all?

6. And do you see that putting the weight loss section across from the candy section might not be the kindest move?

7. Has Cover Girl convinced you yet that Queen Latifah actually makes anyone want to buy Cover Girl?

8. Why is the dog food section always next to the garden section? Are you trying to segregate "smelly" aisles?

9. Why do your cashiers refuse to greet me 80% of the time when they know perfectly well that the little credit card screen is going to ask me if I was greeted?

10. Why does your nightgown section remind me of nursing homes?

11. Who buys those weird DVDs you have on sale for $2?

12. Are you planning on starting to carve Miley Cyrus' face onto the potatoes to try and get those to pick up on sales?

13. Do you really think I care that the new movie with the comedienne whose name I don't remember (because his last 4 movies went straight to DVD) will be releasing his new DVD exclusively at Walmart starting next Tuesday? And do you really think it justifies a 10 food sign at the front of the door?

14. Have you ever considered taking some of your carts out to pasture and putting them out of their misery since many of them seem to have half wheels that THUMP, THUMP, THUMP as you go down the aisle and/or pull to one side so much that you very nearly take out the mustard row on aisle 7?

My Friend Laurie

I've realized of late that every time I'm talking about my friend Laurie, I preface it with "my friend". I never just say "Laurie"-- I guess this is because she is one of my very few close friends that is NOT from college. Almost all of my friends are friends with each other-- and she is one of the few that (for now anyway) is mostly just MY friend. And so I guess that is why to everyone else in my world, she is known as "my friend Laurie".

Anyhoo-- believe it or not, this post is not just to explain the foibles of my speech patterns....... this post is really more to explain the total uniqueness that is my friend Laurie and to tell you all how generally awesome she is. And so, to celebrate her birthday, I present to you a list of some of the reasons that I love Laurie. (At least I'm pretty sure it is her birthday-- if not, she will enjoy the list anyway and generally just think I'm being eccentric)

1. I've never met anyone who puts more thought into her friendships.

2. She remembers everything I've ever told her....even things I don't remember saying. She can tell you the first and middle names of all my nieces and nephews-- and I wouldn't doubt she might know their birthday months too.

3. She is one of the most empowering friends I've ever had (and incidentally, the only one to talk me into buying a backless shirt!)

4. She analyzes things even more than I do. When we get together and analyze a situation I think we could even give Freud a headache.

5. She cherishes and protects the uniqueness of her daughters.

6. She sees eccentricity as a gift.

7. She has no idea how smart she really is. (Ok, I don't really love her for this one-- I wish she DID know how smart she is-- but I had to put it on the list because I like to give her a hard time about it)

8. I can go without talking to her for 6 months (not that I try to do that) and we can still pick right back up where we left off.

9. She is one of the most open-hearted and generous people I know.

10. She talked me into trying laser-hair removal.

11. She let me live with her and finish my thesis and she even bought me Cocoa Puffs.

12. She didn't bat an eye when I told her that her husband should walk around in his flight suit more often.

13. She respects honesty

14. She loves products even more than me.

15. She loves to preface things with "GIRL"-- and I catch myself doing it when I'm talking to her. No one else could make me do that. (not that she tries)

16. She is a wonderful writer.

17. She is incredibly loyal.

18. She threw me a surprise party and really, totally surprised me.

19. She still dances. (And I mean that literally, not metaphorically)