October 7, 2012

Being a Vegan (But not a "Vegan"): Day 1

For the next 6 weeks I will not be eating any animal products (and also following some other ridiculous strict standards). Technically, I suppose this means that I will be vegan. My concerns/notations about this experiment follow:

A. My reasons for doing this defy an intelligent sounding explanation (at least so far). However, I want to make it clear that none of my reasons involve a moral objection to eating cheese.

B. Further to Point A-- I don't really want to tell people that don't already know me well that I'm doing this. Why? Well, because I might be eating a vegan diet for the next 6 weeks but I don't want anyone to think I am a "vegan" (Who knows, maybe eating this way for 6 weeks will give me an odd religious zeal for a way of eating that I will feel the need to talk about endlessly and an urge to judge people who like a good roast beef from Arby's...)

C. Now that I've finished Day #1, I can already tell there are going to be some issues with my culinary laziness.

D. I feel I should email Chick-fil-a and apologize for the hit their bottom line is about to take. (I wonder if the drive-thru crew will miss me)

E. I'm already creating my own rules because any plan that tells me not to snack between meals has clearly never been to a place I like to call Sarah's afternoon cranky time. (Conveniently, it is right next to a Diet Dr Pepper plant)

(Incidentally, never have I ever been able to spell "convenient" correctly with no help. I'll let you appreciate the Alanis Morrisette-ish "irony" for yourself)

F. It may have been really dumb to do this during prime Halloween candy season.

(Feel free to leave angry and offended comments below as necessary)