Belize It Or Not

Yes, the title is unfortunate, but I just couldn't help myself.

Tomorrow morning I'm leaving for a long weekend away (is this what the Brits call a "mini break"?). I'm super excited because I have no earthly idea what to expect, but I'm landing in Belize City in the afternoon (knock on wood) and we'll take it from there!

I've decided this is as opportune a moment as any other to tell my friends and family something I've been meaning to say for some time. You know, just in case I get kidnapped into the jungle or eaten by a crocodile or die of fright when I think I see a shark that really turns out to be a swimming cow (you don't want to know).

Anyhoo.

I'm leaving and I just want you all to know something very important: please, if something dramatic and/or newsworthy happens to me while I'm gone.....can you just make sure that the news media has a decent picture of me? I don't mean to be vain, but has anyone else noticed that whenever something happens to people, the pictures of them up at CNN or MSNBC are always completely dreadful? Who is in charge of this process?

Yes, I realize this is stupid and inconsequential in the long run.....but I would really rather people think "Oh, that's so sad. Look at those freckles, she was so cute! And young! She had the world in front of her!" as opposed to "Oh, that's so sad. But look at those bags under her eyes. And why is she scowling like that? Oh well. No wonder she was single."

I'm not unreasonable. My main requests are as follows:

1. No senior pictures (yes, at this point they are INCREDIBLY dated, but I feel this needs to be said as my mother has shown an irrational attachment to them)

2. No bridesmaid pictures (this needs no explaining)

3. No pictures of me looking at the camera with a "why are you taking that?" expression

4. No pictures of me scowling off into space and/or looking blankly off into space (again, my mother has shown a propensity for taking this type of photo....of course she might argue that this is what I'm doing 90% of the time so what else is she supposed to take a picture of....but she would be lying....I'm sure I must smile off into space SOMETIMES)

See? Not so hard. And if you all help me out, I won't have to haunt anyone. Everyone wins.

(and for those of you who are wondering and don't know-- yes, I have always been this morbid)